mind

Who do I want to be?

So much in life is a decision. It may not seem that way but we choose how to respond to a situation even a bad one. I feel at a crossroads. One one hand I should feel sad, on the other am I letting it consume me such that it creates a downward spiral? For the most part I’ve only dealt with transient loss. In that regard I’m lucky. I feel unprepared for sustained sadness. I know how to skip past the little things but what about huge life altering sadness?

I don’t want to be the one who dwells on sadness and negativity, pushing others away. I suppose there is therapy. There is medication but what of self action and stubbornly refusing to get dragged down?

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4 thoughts on “Who do I want to be?”

  1. In my experience, a life altering sadness takes some time to work through. There was a time in my life when everything felt gloomy for two years due to a life altering event in my own life. Everything felt so dark everyday. My senses were dulled to a point where it difficult to enjoy anything. I couldn’t get out of bed due to crying so hard my heart hurts. I had a difficult time being around people, let alone communicate with them. I had a few counselors who later recommended specialists, but that could only work so far. I hated the medication, and I requested to take it temporarily (3 weeks max). I had to take initiative on my on accord. I had to make several decisions that would help me get to a different state. I had a series of meaningful encounters and activities. I’m amazed at where I am today because now I really enjoy things fully. It will take time. It will take some patience. I hope my testimony can help support you.

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